According to my Dad, who wears only jeans and a t-shirt with the occasional flannel button-up, "Jeans and a t-shirt were never in style, so they'll never go out of style." I always though that was pretty weird logic, but didn't see the point in telling him to dress fancy when he's a truck driver, so I let it slide. I never thought I would turn to those words for comfort. I never thought those words would finally help me accept myself for who I am.
I've always been a little shy. I've also always been a little out of touch with fashion. My sister-in-law Chelsey was shopping with me once and said, "Girl, where's your sense of style?" Yeah, I never had one. Combine the two (shyness and lack of style) and I am terrified of accessories, flashy jewelry, colorful shoes or pants, and mix-matched clothes of any type. My horror boils down to one question: "What if I match something that doesn't actually match?" I realize that half of having style is making your own by wearing a yellow shirt with red pants (maybe?) but I've never had the guts to actually wear those or purple sneakers or a floral scarf. What if the red is a shade too dark or the shirt a shade too mustard?
Well the other day, I solved my style issues. I was at Wal-Mart and saw another t-shirt sale. $4.88 for a shirt that looked like it could be from Old Navy. In the cart it goes. The next time, I saw a purple shirt and thought, Chelsey would tell me that if I want it, it's purple, and it's less than $5, I should get it. In the cart it goes. I felt so comfortable wearing my two new shirts. I got compliments, I walked tall, and I felt good. I realized that I felt so much better in my jeans and t-shirt than I usually do in a more dressy outfit. I realized that my horror for fashion and style are really my aversion to trying to be something I'm not. I am in no way saying that people who dress up and use awesome accessories or wear colorful jeans are pretending to be something they're not, I'm just saying that for me, fancy pants are out. Red shoes are out. Jeans and a t-shirt are in! I'm also not saying I'll never wear anything stylish. I do have awesome family to shop with and to give me presents (hint, hint!) and help me find cute stuff, but I am saying that I will no longer reject the me that I am. I am going to be happy wearing plain old clothes and just enjoy the more important things in life!
Thanks, Dad, for teaching me that jeans and a t-shirt are okay, and for teaching me that I'm much more than okay. I love you.
Anyone who knows me often hears the phrase, "Remember when...?" Garrett and I spent the winter saying, "Remember this time last year when I was pregnant and we went sledding down the street after the blizzard, and I ran into a parked car?", "Remember this time last year when you were pregnant and we ate Carl's JR at the park 3 times in one week because we got coupons, and now you associate that restaurant with pregnancy and hate it?", "Remember this time last year when I first felt the baby kick and a month or so later you felt her too?" Well now I'm remembering this time last year and I'm about to cry because it's my last day saying I was pregnant this time last year. April 12 was the last night I went to bed as a childless woman. Within the next 24 hours my identity changed and I became a mother. I was suddenly in charge of someone else's every single need. That tiny baby needed me to survive. This last year has been more fulfilling than I ever would have guessed it last April 12. I have grown and changed so much since then. I am so grateful for every moment I have spent being a mom for a year.
